Sparks in Wisdom's Fire: mindfulness

Showing posts with label mindfulness. Show all posts

Tuesday, June 13, 2023

I am awake

I am awake. Not the eyes opening at the sound of an alarm clock kind of awake. No, the awareness that comes from being in the moment — noticing how I am distracted, acknowledging the distractions, and moving back into the present moment, ready to listen to what is evolving. And, the more I am awake, the more that I discover how I am getting caught in my distractions!

This kind of awareness is not so easy. It takes practice. I remember during my coach training that the instructor told us more than once: practice does not make perfect; practice makes permanent. Isn’t that what being awake in the moment is all about? We don’t always hear that soft voice of intuition; but the more we listen for it, the easier it becomes to identify those messages. We may never be perfectly intuitively, but, with practice, we get better at recognizing how it speaks to us.

That is what this intuitive journey is all about — recognizing what we are seeing and attending to what we recognize.

How do we do this? By noticing what is happening in and around us — by being aware. Try this: at certain points in the day, ask yourself what is trying to get your attention. This could be a distraction or an intuitive message. Don’t worry about discerning what is what. Practice identifying what is knocking on the door of your being.

Focus on the internal:

What is spinning in your mind?
What emotions are your feeling?
What is your body telling you?

Don’t give yourself too long. You do not want to second guess yourself. Maybe 30-45 seconds for each question. Quickly jot down your noticings.

Next focus on the external. Use all five of your senses to identity what is vying for your attention.

Again, don’t give yourself too long. Notice for maybe 60-75 seconds.

Notice what resonates with you; notice what drags you down. If you have time later, journal about what you picked up. Keep your notes. Pay attention to patterns. Learn to separate, through trial and error, what is a distraction and what is intuitive. You may not become perfectly intuitive but accessing your intuition will become permanent.

Vanessa Hurst is the author of As Natural As Breathing: Being Intuitive. As an intuitive catalyst, she guides individuals in recognizing and responding to their intuition. Curious? Schedule an intuitive conversation.

Tuesday, November 22, 2022

A Magical Mindfulness Formula

Navigating Difficult Conversations

Communication + the Holidays. Right about now you may be wishing that you had brushed up on your communication skills. Picture this: you are at a holiday gathering and get into a conversation with someone doesn’t have the same beliefs that you do. How do you respond to one more alternative fact?

Maybe you get frustrated and are on the verge of saying something rash. Logically, you know that is not the answer. What is the magic formula to not escalating a difficult situation? Instead of forming a reactionary reply, focus on yourself. This isn’t so hard once you follow a magical mindfulness formula.

Yes, you heard me right. The magic begins with a focus on you. Now, this isn’t about falling into a fantasy world where only you exist. It is about listening objectively to what another is saying while noticing the impact that their words have on you. Trust me, this is not as easy as it sounds. While with practice you don’t become perfect, your ability to navigate difficult conversations become permanent.

There isn’t time to take a six-week course on compassionate listening. This is a bootcamp blog: you learn a simple technique that takes the focus off the words of another and puts it onto the emotions triggered inside of you during a conversation. In this heightened state of awareness, you notice how you are getting caught by the words and body language of another.

With this knowledge of your triggers, you can slip from a state of high anxiety into a place of calm understanding. You are better able to traverse the minefield of reactions into the calm peace of response. Let’s bootcamp the simple steps:

Center and anchor yourself. A simple way to do this is to walk coordinating the steps to your breath. Inhale as your roll your right foot heel to toe. Exhale as you roll you left foot heel to toe. As you walk connecting breath to movement, affirm your intent to be aware of your reactions to potential triggers. (I do this as I walk from car to front door of a gathering.)

During a conversation, play attention with your full body. This means listening with all of your senses and checking in with your body, mind, and emotions. Ask yourself: “Is my body tense or relaxed? What is my internal monologue saying? What is my emotional temperature? What is my body, my mind, and ,y emotions telling me?” This is fact finding — noticing the mines in the conversation field and how they may trigger your reactions.

Objectively use information that you have received about how the conversation is impacting you. Maybe you are able to offer objective comments about the topic. Or, perhaps your body, mind, and spirit are shouting at you: “I am being triggered. I cannot maintain neutral. TIME TO GO!” When you feel that an outburst or meltdown is eminent, stop listening to the conversation. Return to your breath. Feel it flow through your body relaxing away tension. Let it soothe any ruffled emotions. Calm your thoughts. Connect more fully to your core. When you are ready, compassionately end the conversation. (For example, you can say, “It was great talking with you. I want to catch up with [insert name]. Thanks again! Have a terrific holiday.)

Remember, you cannot stop the words or actions of another. You can stop your reactions to them. Defuse the ticking time bomb by focusing on your breath. This gives you the energy to show up as your best self.

One last thought: come up with an exit strategy when entering a minefield. You may need to leave the gathering all together. That is perfectly okay. Remember, this is about taking care of you by creating an oasis of calm that you can call upon whenever you find yourself triggered. When you have control over you, there is less of an opportunity to be emotionally hijacked. And, while not perfect, your practice of taking care of you becomes permanent.

Life is all about you. The only way you can help others is by first helping yourself.

Van Hurst, ms, is an intuitive-coach-catalyst. As a contemplative coach, she uses mindfulness practices and intuition tools to create strategies for navigating the mundane and extraordinary. The result of time with Van? Being the change you want to see in the world by creating a blueprint for your life through a deeper connection to your intuition and contemplative nature.

Van is a professional speaker & author who weaves inner wisdom into all she touches. Her books are available @ www.wildefyrpress.com. Her most recent book, As Natural As Breathing: Being Intuitive, is available on Amazon. Contact Vanessa for life coaching, intuitive consultations, keynotes, and programs.

Tuesday, November 15, 2022

Choosing to Twinkle

The first snow of the season gently coated skeleton trees. Coated white, their crispy leaves fell to the ground. I found myself snapping photo after photo of the falling white. The magic of the snow and the click of the camera calmed my soul.

Hours later darkness has fallen and the night lights glint off the remaining snow. Tomorrow the sun will stop hiding. It’s rays will cause melting — goodbye early season snow! For now, I am going to sit in the quiet of the snow and let its balm bring peace to my soul.

Peace of snow. Peace of soul. Do you have a practice of moving out of the disquiet and into the calm? Even when I am not aware of discord, it ruffles my being. It is the unsettledness that will not be denied no matter how much I focus on something else. How do you move from that feeling of something not quite right to neutralizing what is ruffling you? How do you wake the twinkling of hope, joy, and possibility?

Sometimes this twinkling seems just out of reach. How do we move from discord to twinkle? When I slip into the snow-calm, the world that comes to me is simple. Whatever I do, wherever I find myself, however I choose to be, I need to keep it simple. Keeping my response simple increases my awareness. It shines a light on how to live in the unevenness in ways that make me more balanced. Simple is an inside job that opens the door to, well, our inner self.

When we are infused with simple, our focus is on our self. This means that the distractions are more easily identified and the illusions recognized. We can choose not to get caught in the disquiet. What doesn’t catch us, we do not judge. Nonattached, nonjudgmental, we focus on maintaining calm and showing up twinkling…balanced.

First we have to get to that place of being simply our self. For me, today the entrance to that place is snow. The falling fluff calms my anxiety and lets me breathe into wonder. I do admit that if I needed to be somewhere the snow might have had an opposite effect on me. So, finding your simple is about discovering what works for you!

Being in the simple is an ongoing discovery. It is an invitation to listen to the whispers in your soul and discover what calls you in this moment. Ask yourself, “What quiets my spirit and what causes its ruffling?” Then, choose a simple way to soothe your soul. Do this over and over again until simple becomes an intuitive response to the unevenness in your life.

Don’t be afraid of not getting it right. Life invites us into a place where simple and complex clash, and, within the clash, we find the best way forward.

Tuesday, August 23, 2022

I’ve got a secret

I’ve got a secret. Wanna know what it is? I’m scared. Yeah. I don’t like to admit it. Maybe you don’t either.

Just this week I admitted my fear to a friend. The world events — natural and human — are plain scary. I found myself saying, “If you aren’t scared, you are not paying attention.”

This is not the fear that paralyzes me. Although if I ignore it, I can get tripped up. No, this is the fear that like nails on a chalkboard, scratches into my consciousness. A reedy, strident voice grates, “Pay attention. Listen to me.” And, I do.

This fear splashes cold dread on my being. This dread not does trigger a frigid spiral into paralysis. No, this cold splash wakes my courage. In this awakening, I peer through the fear to discover what is hiding beyond the cloying tangle.

One thing that I have realized is that fear is seldom a simple emotion. It is this complex tangle of many elements. When it get caught in the tangle, I feel my anxiety grow, see the worst case scenario, and feel the mire of no-way-out. Maybe you’ve been there, too.

But, neither of us needs to be stuck in that messy tangle. That is where courage comes in. For courage says, “Yes, you might be caught in the tangle. You may feel that your breath is being strangled from your body. But you don’t need to remain in this stasis of fear. The way through the tangle is to focus on your breath. Breathe through your fear.”

So, I breathe first taking short, regular breaths to loosen the tangle. Then I elongate the breaths soon finding a calm within the rhythm of the inhale/exhale. As courageous calm builds, I focus on what I am feeling to discover the roots of my fear.

I begin by simple saying, “show me why I fear.” The untangling begins as I look into the face of the fear’s blossom, travel from the blossom to the stem, and then journey to where the stem of fear digs into the ground becoming roots. Those roots dig deep into the ground of my being. When I am unaware, those roots send tremors of fear throughout my body, mind, spirit, and heart.

The roots need not stay buried within my soul. Courage is a trowel that gently exposes the roots while listening for the tales of fear’s origin humming within the soil of my soul. Within this melody I recognize that fear is fed on the compost of shame, the not-so-good-enough, regrets, and other inadequacies that pulse through me.

Courage is fierce bravery fed by quiet understanding. Courage invites me to journey through the fear so that I can refresh, reimagine, and renew my spirit. I might not be totally able to silence the voice of fear, but I can meet it with the courage of compassion. I can alleviate some of the suffering that is seeded by fear.

I am scared, but I will not allow the fear to consume me. Instead I will meet it courageously and compassionately. I know that you can do the same.

Tuesday, August 9, 2022

Who Are You?

Have you ever asked yourself, “Who am I? If you are like me, you’ve asked yourself this question a time or a thousand. This is not a one and done kind of question. No, it is meant to be reflected upon over and over again as you discover yourself anew. It’s the curiosity of how my perception has shifted that has me answering this question over and over again.

The answers are found not in the roles we play, but in the roots growing deeply into our core. That which twines throughout our being and manifests in how we act. It’s from our roots that the evolution of our answer flows!

How do we discover the me in the moment?

Breath Deep of Your Essence

This is more than a physical breath. It is moving past the barriers, the illusions, the stuff of who you are not into seeing who you are — the bright and the shadows. You do not have to like what is exposed. It is in the owning of who you are that opens you to growth.

Breathe deep of this essence. Notice the fear and the joy that rides on the breath of this acknowledgement. Awaken the courage to be the you that grows from the roots twining into your core.

Awaken the Courage at Your Core

Life is filled with this incredible kaleidoscope of emotions. Some uplift; others have you running for the nearest refuge. All these emotions are unapologetically you. You can bask in the joy, the happy, the wonder. You can run from that which scares us. What I have realized is that no matter how long, no matter how fast I run, I cannot give my shadow the slip. It paces me.

In time, you either meet your shadow with courage or it wears your down. I, for one, would like to meet my shadow with courage because far too many times it has worn me into fatigue. Take a deep breath of courage, enter the shadow, and look into the eyes of fear. This is the way of through. On this journey you discover the wonder of who you are.

Share Your Wonder with the World

Fears confronted, name one thing that is your wonder. It can be anything about you — small, huge, somewhere in-between. Decide how you will share this wonder with the world. Don’t discount any action, word, or thought that changes you for the better — they are all part of the sharing. For those things light your courage and gainssss the potential to transform both you and the world as you know it.

Breathe deep of your essence, awaken the courage at your core, share you wonder with the world. That is all. That is your enough.

Tuesday, June 21, 2022

These Times Are A Changing

These Times they are a changing…what are they changing? Us — me & you!

We are in a wonderfully amazing, fiercely terrifying, possibility-filled time. Yeah, there are times that I jump past the wonder and amazement through the possibility and right into fierce terror. These times might be chaotic, but do I really need to get caught in the snare of my fear?

With that question, I mentally/

emotionally back up to get a clear image of what is happening. I remind myself that this is my wisdom year. It is not every year I celebrate my croning! This is my year to explore the wonder, breathe deeply into my core, and exhale wisdom into the moment. There are times when I feel that I didn’t get the message about being the wisdom keeper that I shared with everyone else.

Then I remember that shenpa is part of each of our journeys. This is the word that Buddhists use for what catches us. I ask myself, “What catches you?” The answer is simpler than getting untangled from the result! When I am not aware, the list of triggers to my reactions is endless. When I am aware, I can see those snares and sidestep them.

So, ask yourself: “what catches me?” If you aren’t quite certain, spend time paying attention to what is triggering you. There are no wrong answers to this question. Each answer echoes in what is impacting you in the moment.

Why is identifying your shenpa important? If I have learned nothing in the past six decades, it is that I need to identify what catches me before I can go forward. Unless we — you and I — identify the stuff that lures us into a sticky web of reactions then we are going to continue to walk right into it.

What is that thing that catches you? Name it. Then do a deep dive to the root. You might discover an aggravation, anger, fear, or something totally different. To neutralize the shenpa, you’ve got to name it! That naming starts at the root where you eradicate the tangle of shenpa.

Mindfulness — being aware in the moment stops you from getting caught in shenpa and reacting. In those moments that you just are not present and get caught, don’t beat yourself up! Afterward find a time of silence. Reflect. Identify what tangles you. Remember, knowledge is power. Power helps you to navigate what catches you in the moment. That navigation leads to a life of transformation.

So, these times are a changing. I hope that you and I are changing in ways that make us more resilient and aware.

Van Hurst, ms, is an intuitive-coach-catalyst. As a contemplative coach, she uses mindfulness practices and intuition tools to create strategies for navigating the mundane and extraordinary. The result of time with Van? Creating a blueprint for your life through a deeper connection to your intuition and contemplative nature.

Tuesday, June 7, 2022

Fierce Magic

Each time I walked this week the world became more and more alive. With each turn around the building I saw something new. The world was alive, wild, and free. It woke up something inside of me. The newness called me to move through the uncertainty and enter the fierce beauty of the margins.

Nature reminded me that life is fluid and dynamic. I heard its whisper, “What will you choose?” In that moment on the margins I chose to be fiercely, unapologetically me. That is, I chose to live from my core.

Let’s return to that thickness I felt. It seems that the world is atilt. Can you feel it? Standing in the center of the tumult just makes me dizzy! When I stand in the margins of this tilt-a-whirl world, I can feel the freshness zipping by me. Hope blossoms as I edge more fully into the margins.

There is a comfort in the wild. I can hear the feral invitation to see the world not as the scary, uncertain place but as a new paradigm. I am called to be in the world with a new perspective — a place where the possible becomes real.

The margins are the place where truth calls, where courage sings, and beauty touches every aspect of life. How do you get there? By letting go of the fear of uncertainty. Enter the margins by anchoring into your core.

Try this: begin by breathing into your core. If you are unsure where your core is located, ask to be shown the flickering spark. Follow the breath to your spark. At the core, your breath ignites the spark sending out tendrils of your being toward the sky and into the ground.

These tendrils travel deeply into the earth. Your roots connect you to Mother Earth. Once connected, bring this twining energy up to your core. See yourself become a tree.

Feel the tendrils moving up from your core creating a canopy of self that brushes against the Source above. Through Earth and Sky and Self notice the many ways the Sacred calls to you. Find rhythm in your connection to sacred.

Connected to sacred, step out of your comfort zone. Do something different — even if it is just a thought — be in a place that makes you uneasy. Find comfort in the unknowing. I know that this is scary hard, but it is the path to growth and change.

Ask yourself — what am I seeing? What am I hearing? What am I sensing? How am I called to be in the margins? How will I make a difference in myself? In changing myself, how do I change the world?

Realize that you do not have to answer all these questions in the moment. They are answered in your way, in your time.

I know that life is uncertain, sometimes scary. Join me in the margins to discover the courage, the strength, the fierce magic that is you.

Van Hurst, ms, is an intuitive-coach-catalyst. As a contemplative coach, she uses mindfulness practices and intuition tools to create strategies for navigating the mundane and extraordinary. The result of time with Van? Creating a blueprint for your life through a deeper connection to your intuition and contemplative nature.

Tuesday, May 24, 2022

The Anchor & The Antenna

In the stillness of the night. In the quiet of the breeze, dreams slip through the subconscious of our soul making themselves known. In those dreams magic and mystery bubbles.

This isn’t the magic or the mystery of sleight of the hand. That really isn’t magic. This is the magic of manifestation and the mystery of hope. As dreams slip through our consciousness the possibility of realizing our purpose increases.

Okay, I can almost hear you say, is it that easy? Well, sometimes. In those moments when we recognize the threads of magic and mystery, we follow them to our soul purpose. In those moments it is a simple thing to twine those threads deep into our being.

At other times we have difficulty connecting to the mystery and the magic. We need help! That help begins by turning ourself into a giant antenna and grounding that antenna into the earth while connecting it to the source. The antenna hears the voice of your dreams and serves as a conduit for messages.

Here's a meditation (available on YouTube): Let’s begin. Take a couple of breaths…don’t try to shift your breathing…just notice your breath…envision a golden light surrounding you…inhale this light through your crown…follow your it throughout your body…notice the golden strand of Sacred twine with the strand of Self…as you breathe, envision the golden energy continue to weave with your strand as it flows through your head…with each breath it moves through your head…down your neck…branches out and flows across your shoulders…down both of your arms…through your wrists…out the palm of your hand and your finger tips…with your next breath, return to your neck…the energy flows down your chest, past your heart, through your solar plexus, into your lower torso…feel the energy flow as it travels down both of your legs…flowing down, down, down until it leaves your body through the soles of your feet…let your energy be drawn into the earth…as your energy sinks into the earth, it roots into the Earth…the strands of Sacred and Self twine with the Strand of Earth…feel the triad energy root you deeply into the earth…feel your connection to Earth…as you exhale, breath into the earth…share your self with Earth…as you inhale, bring Earth energy to your body…this energy forms of cord of three strands — Self, Sacred, and Earth…with each breath draw this mingled energy up your body…it enters your feet…moves up your legs…the energy streams join in your pelvis…moves up your torso…chest…through your neck…through your head…the golden light, a three strand cord, continues out your crown chakra….it reaches up to connect with the Source…feel the cord that travels from above your head to deep into the Earth…feel how this anchors you into the moment…breathe into the cord that connects you to all of creation.

Now envision that strands of the cord begin to spiral around your body. The spiral is made of copper. It begins at the top of your head connecting to the Source. It wraps around your body spiraling to the body of your feel. It terminates by burying itself into the earth. Now feel the energy of the Source, the Earth, and You amplifying your ability to sense the magic, the mystery that seeks to speak with you.

This is your antenna. Ask a question. Listen to the answer. Or, say, “Show me. I am listening.” Trust that the magic, the mystery, really whatever you need to be aware of, need to hear, need to respond to will resonate in your core.

Missed the meditation? Here it is:

Van Hurst, ms, is an intuitive-coach-catalyst. As a contemplative coach, she uses mindfulness practices and intuition tools to create strategies for navigating the mundane and extraordinary. The result of time with Van? Creating a blueprint for your life through a deeper connection to your intuition and contemplative nature.

Tuesday, May 10, 2022

A Gift To Be Given (That Would Be YOU!)

Each of us is endowed with unique gifts. How did we get these gifts? Well, let me tell you a story…

The Creator sat across the table from me before I was born. The Sacred said, “which gifts would you like to carry through this life?” I chose my gifts. The Creator and I agreed upon the accompanying challenges. You cannot have gift without a ribbon of challenge! They go hand-in-hand. In the embracing and sharing of my gifts, I would learn life lessons and share my real.

I was quite pleased with the gifts that I chose. I was ready to enter this life prepared to gain further enlightenment AND change the world. Of course, I was focusing more on the magic of possibility and didn’t quite remember how hard challenges could be!

I may have seriously underestimated some of my life challenges.

I’m born. As I grow through the decades, I live and learn while celebrating the successes and agonizing over the near successes. Never do I lose the desire to share who I am and my gifts with those around me. That is the key. A gift is meant to be given. I (you) can only grow by reaching out to those in my (your) circle. As we share, the circle expands and so do our gifts.

Malidoma Somé, an African shaman of the Dagara people, teaches that each of us are born with a unique gift that is meant to be shared. This is our soul or life purpose. We are responsible for giving birth to the gift.

We do not give birth in isolation. Those in our community are equally responsible for the birthing process. They create a supportive environment in which we, as individuals, flourish. The only way that we can live through our gift is to be a part of a loving, supportive community that only thrives through the sharing of each member’s gift.

Within this communal birthing is the magic of possibility. We share our gifts, community supports us, we support community, others share their gifts — a smagical sharing that transcends spiral from us, from our community, and into the world.

This spiral of love and compassion through gift giving reaches out to others offering love and acceptance. We discover that abundance does not exist solely for ourself. It exists in sharing what we have and in celebrating and sharing the gifts of our being.

What are your unique gifts? How are you sharing them? How can you share your gifts? Perhaps before sharing each gift, you whisper a prayer or blow love before giving it to another. Maybe you discover intangible ways to share love with those in your circle. Or, perhaps, just maybe, you set your intent to be the blessing, the gift, light that you agreed with the Creator to be.

Spend a few moments, as often as you can, acknowledging that conversation of so long ago. Even if you cannot remember the conversation or the nature of your gift, affirm that you are gift. Acknowledge your purpose. Affirm your willingness to be that gift to the world.

Van Hurst, ms, is an intuitive-coach-catalyst. As a contemplative coach, she uses mindfulness practices and intuition tools to create strategies for navigating the mundane and extraordinary. The result of time with Van? Creating a blueprint for your life through a deeper connection to your intuition and contemplative nature.