No Labels, No Rules, No Definitions

How would you like to live in a place of no labels, no rules, no definitions? I can almost hear you say, “YIKES!” If everything in life had none of the three, we would descend into chaos pretty quickly. While we need labels, rules, and definitions to create boundaries in most parts of our life, accessing our intuition is not one of these places.

Because being intuitive, accessing your inner wisdom, requires a flexibility that cannot be bounded by labels, rules, or definitions. I’d say that the only expectation to have when listening to your intuition is to expect the unexpected. Because just when we have figured out how we access intuition, we discover new ways to hear the voices of our intuition.

I like to think of my intuition as an inquisitive communicator. While it tells me some serious stuff, the way it goes about sharing comes from all angles, through all of my senses, and, often, in code. It invites me to deepen my understanding of the message by asking questions. At times, I feel like intuition is saying, “I’ve got some information, let’s do some Q&A.” 

On this jaunt, intuition dangles its message just on the tips of my finger or perhaps my tongue. It is never so far away that I cannot grasp the message at least partially. And, that is perfectly okay. It may take more than just this moment to understand the entirety of the message. I’ve learned to be okay with the evolution of my intuitive understanding. 

How do we undertake this journey? And, what tools do we need to excavate the messages? Two of the most important tools are gentleness toward yourself (self compassion) and awareness (mindfulness). If you are not in the moment, you won’t hear the message. If you are not gentle with yourself, you will become so tense that you miss message after message after message until your intuition begins to shout at you.

I know that both self compassion and mindfulness are easier said than done! So, let’s break them down.

• Be gentle with yourself. Don’t expect an answer to every intuitive pondering. Don’t expect to recognize every message that comes your way. The important stuff will come back around until you finally recognize it. Trust in that. This doesn’t give you permission to be sloppy and non-attentive, it just reduces performance anxiety.
• Be aware or in the moment. This takes practice. Most of us aren’t really good about being in the moment. We get caught in the past or find ourself fleeing into the future. How do I stay in the moment? Post-it notes with reminders, setting alarms, taking time out to ask myself what kept me in the moment and what drew me out. And, sometimes, my intuition will nudge me into the moment with a gentle reminder. Think about how your intuitive gets your attention.

Ready to practice…breathe into the moment. Notice where your anxiety manifests. Breathe into your anxiety, your fears, your desire to know. Then open yourself up. What is the one thing that is stands out? It could be a word, an image, a symbol, a smell, a taste…just notice without judgment. Then open yourself to what you have received. Allow your mind to follow your intuition by free association…allow the message to unfold.

An example: Recently I noticed that I was not wearing orange, but a lot of food that I was eating was orange. What is my intuition telling me? Since I know the energy body, I immediately thought of my second chakra which is represented by the color orange. That is the center of creativity. 

Using this information about what I was eating plus the information that I would not wear orange, I discerned that I was trying to jumpstart my creativity, really work on the book I was writing, even though I had not written in quite some time. So, my intuition was nudging me to complete a project. 

How about you? There is no real science to intuition. We create our own guidelines, we define what it means to be intuitive, and, yes, we choose what we label our selves. So, call yourself intuitive if you’d like, because it is what nudges you into being yourself. 

 

Vanessa F. Hurst, ms, is an intuitive-coach-catalyst. As a contemplative coach, she uses mindfulness practices and intuition tools to create strategies for navigating those scary places. The result? Creating a blue print for your life through a deeper connection to your intuition. She is a professional speaker & author who weaves inner wisdom into all she touches. Her books are available @ www.wildefyrpress.com. Her most recent book, As Natural As Breathing: Being Intuitive, is available on Amazon. Contact Vanessa for life coaching, intuitive consultations, keynotes, and programs.

Website / LinkedIn Profile / Facebook / @fyrserpent 

©2021

A Heart So Big

Being Courageous, Confident, & Compassionate

Within me is a heart so big it cannot be contained. It shines upon the world clearing the way through this moment and each moment. In this shining, I become whole. 

So, what is it within my heart — and within yours, too — that is so brilliant that it chases away the shadows and brings hope to us? The light is lit by courage, confidence, and compassion.

Courage. 

The world is filled with so many opportunities that we may become overwhelmed. Our mind fogs up with fear until we are unsure what to do. We may hide in the shadow afraid to confront what scares us. Or, we gather our courage, pick the sure thing, go out on a limb, or decide upon something in between. That decision making takes courage no matter what we choose. 

If you are like me, your mind darts in a circle from what might be to what might be until you are not sure the next sept. Courage slows the course of the what-might-be dash. It is the calming agent that says, “we can never be 100% sure, but we’ve got to try.” Courage empowers us to slip through the what might be’s into the action of what is. Courage doesn’t clear the path; it powers our clearing of the path. It is the voice that assures us “you got this.” 

Confidence. 

With courage we gain the strength to meet any given situation. Confidence goes hand-in-hand with that strength. For, confidence is knowing who you are — your talents and limitations. It is the conviction in your ability to choose the right course. It is the foundation of your resilience; your ability  to meet risk. Confidence reminds us that while we cannot plan for everything, we can approach any risk in a flexible, measured way.

Risk. Now that is a charged word. With risk there is always the possibility that things won’t work out the way you want. With confidence you use your skills and talents in a given situation no matter how difficult. It weighs the pros and cons with its can-do attitude and makes objective decisions. 

Confidence brings you brings you to the brink of a new horizon. Courage has you leaping into the new. Sometimes things don’t go as planned. Compassion eases the suffering when things don’t go as planned.

Compassion.

Of course, we’ve all had those moments when things don’t go as planned. It is hard not to get mired in the what ifs that causes suffering. Courage and confidence call for compassion. No matter how courageous, no matter how confident, we all suffer. Being able to identify and alleviate that suffering is what makes us whole.

So, what do we do when we suffer? We practice self compassion. Self compassion, for me, begins with self forgiveness and releasing any shaming or blaming. It’s telling myself that maybe I didn’t get it right, but that is okay. What happened hurt, but I can learn from the suffering. That learning often comes when the fog of suffering clears. 

What is this thing called self compassion? It is an action directed toward our self. There is no one-size-fits-all approach to it. Self compassion takes many forms. The great thing? You get to choose how to alleviate your own suffering. For me, it might be a reset nap, journaling, exercising, contemplative practice, self care — the list is as endless as our potential.

The only objective of self compassion is that you suffer less. And, that is enough. The more you gift yourself with self compassion, the greater your courage and confidence to be that shining light emanating from a heart that cannot be contained.  

Vanessa F. Hurst, ms, is a a courageous, confident compassionista. As a contemplative coach, an intuitive-coach-catalyst, she uses mindfulness practices and intuition tools to create strategies for navigating those scary places. The result? Reframing imperfections into personal transformation. She is a professional speaker & author who weaves inner wisdom into all she touches. Her books are available @ www.wildefyrpress.com. Her most recent book, As Natural As Breathing: Being Intuitive, is available on Amazon. Contact Vanessa for life coaching, intuitive consultations, keynotes, and programs.

Website / LinkedIn Profile / Facebook / Twitter: @fyrserpent / ©2021 /

  

Name It. Reframe It.

The world is a wild, wonderful, gentle, ferocious place. Yeah, it’s a place of contractions. Both external and internal. Do you feel the internal contradictions simmering? Do you feel them boiling, edging closer to the rim of your being? Maybe they slip over the edge and splash into the contradictions of the world. 

When that stuff boils over, it scalds away our veneer of illusion revealing a truth that cannot be denied. I am not sure this is the truth we want or even expect. This truth sheds light on our imperfections. I know, imperfection is not a pretty word. It is one that we like to hide from. 

What is an imperfection any way? Two definitions: An undesirable feature. The state of not being complete. But, what if we expanded these definitions? Instead of seeing an imperfection as undesirable what if we viewed it as part of the road map the leads us deeper into who we are? An imperfection isn’t something that makes us incomplete; no, an imperfection is a tool that leads us to our authentic self — it makes us whole. 

I don’t know about you, but I’ve committed to stop running from my imperfections. There is no escaping them. I like to believe that each imperfection that I uncover serves a purpose in my life. I believe that when we name and reframe our imperfections, we live into who we are and better understand the world — people and situations. To sum it up: we become more compassionate to our self and others. 

Okay, so the world is filled with contradictions. We are in this world, so we, too, are filled with contradictions. I see these contradictions as imperfections. I named it (contradictions). I reframed it (imperfections). How do we use the energy of our imperfections to shine the beauty of our soul?

Go a step further in naming/reframing. 

• Name your imperfection. Just name one thing that you don’t do perfect. It doesn’t matter how big or small — just name it. 
• Then dig into the imperfection. What are the limitations? What are the benefits? Take a sheet of paper. Draw a line down the middle. Put a + at the top of one side. Put a - at the top of the other. Set a timer for five minutes. Just write. Don’t think about it. Create a list from what comes to you. There is time for reflection later. 
• After the five minutes, take a look at what you wrote. Find the  truth behind each limitation. Reframe the limitations into learning moments. How do the limitations help you to shift your behavior? 
• Acknowledge the benefits of the imperfections. Then ask: Is there another way to get these results other than reacting from the imperfections? Name how to get the results you want by reframing your reactions to responses. 

The world is a scary place. I think that our imperfections are some of the scariest parts. It is what lies at the root of our so called imperfections that force our reactions. So, how can we shift from living with imperfections to thriving through imperfections? Now means not running away; taking charge. It is about being in the moment and staying in the moment no matter how difficult naming and reframing your imperfection is.  

Vanessa F. Hurst, ms, is a Master Reframer. As a contemplative coach, an intuitive-coach-catalyst, she uses mindfulness practices and intuition tools to create strategies for navigating those scary places. The result? Reframing imperfections into personal transformation. She is a professional speaker & author who weaves inner wisdom into all she touches. Her books are available @ www.wildefyrpress.com. Her most recent book, As Natural As Breathing: Being Intuitive, is available on Amazon. Contact Vanessa for life coaching, intuitive consultations, keynotes, and programs.

Website / LinkedIn Profile / Facebook / @fyrserpent / ©2021 

Fear Shows Us Where Hope Lives

The world is shifting, morphing into something new. I do not believe we will return to what was. I see this time as an evolution into what will be. This is a bold time of uncertainty. And, there are time I am afraid. Maybe you are, too.

One of the things that I’ve realized is that Pema Chödrön had it right — we live in places that scare us. Well, maybe you don’t, but I will own being scared by the unfolding uncertainty in this time. Does it stop me from living in this new world? Of course not. 

Uncertainty is never without its companion, Hope. While there is a lot to fear, those moments are opportunities to flex our courage muscles. The fear, the uncertainty, the hope are waking us up to who we truly are. And, maybe knowing who we are is the scariest thing of all!

Collectively and individually, we are walking down a deeply rutted path of uncertainty. We don’t know where the path is leading. If I had to guess, I’d say that the world won’t ever return to normal. That probably isn’t a bad thing. We may step into some fear on this road, but within those ruts fragile stems of hope are beginning to peek out. The key is to be aware of what scares us while allowing the tendrils of hope to energize our way forward.

We need to pay attention. Name our fears. Call upon our courage. Never give up hope. Remember that when we acknowledge our fears, we are less likely to get caught in their tangles. When we act with courage, the hold that fear has on us weakens. And, hope clears the path into this new way of being.

What exactly is courage? It is not giving up, acknowledging fear, being brave enough to venture past our comfort zone into this fierce world of potential. It's looking our self in the eye and saying, “Maybe this shall not pass, but I will grow through it by being the person I know that I am.”

What is hope? Hope is anticipation, it is expectation, it is a willingness to follow our dreams into realization. When we hope, we say to our self, “Don’t give up. One more step. One more try. Just around the bend. You are not growing into. You are living into who you are.” 

I go back to the book that I read about the Shambhala warrior. We can choose to be a warrior by being gentle and courageous on this quest to understand our self. Amid the fear, the uncertainty, we can choose to be the goodness that radiates hope into the world.

With hope and courage we are called to discern our role in the untamed world filled with unrealized potential. We are called to act from our contemplative heart — to choose to be anchored in our authentic nature while being a beacon of hope. We take small steps, engage in brave acts on this journey of sharing our self.

So, how do we live into who we are? 

• Be aware. Two tools that increase your awareness: Be aware by anchoring into the moment. Shield by creating a permeable barrier between you and the world. 
• Discern how you are called to show up. This means contemplatively listening to that voice within.
• Act. Be okay with whatever your response is. If an action feels too big, dial it back to where your actions are just outside your comfort zone. Then act. 

Fear will always be with us. If you are like me, it pops up when you least expect it. Fear isn’t bad. It is an opportunity to courageously show up as our best self. Fear shows us where hope lives when we listen. 

Vanessa F. Hurst, ms, is lives in the margins…the places that share us. As a contemplative coach, an intuitive-coach-catalyst, she uses mindfulness practices and intuition tools to create strategies for navigating those scary places. The result? Personal transformation. She is a professional speaker & author who weaves inner wisdom into all she touches. Her books are available @ www.wildefyrpress.com. Her most recent book, As Natural As Breathing: Being Intuitive, is available on Amazon. Contact Vanessa for life coaching, intuitive consultations, keynotes, and programs.

Website / LinkedIn Profile / Facebook / Twitter: @fyrserpent / ©2021/

Being on the Cusp in Times of Uncertainty

A friend described this time we are in as being on the cusp. We both wondered, “The cusp of what?” If a cusp is a transition point, what are we transitioning to? That is the question. Maybe knowing the question allows us to consciously live into the answer. 

I don’t know about you, but these past months have given me ample opportunity to practice being the moment, to rest in the silence, to spend a lot of time with myself. (If it weren’t for my part time job, I’d say I would have been in alone time overload.) Some of that time was spent in celebration of who I am while other points of time were spent in the discomfort of what I discovered.

This cusp of transition is not always a warm and fuzzy place. It is an edgy space of exposure. We are given ample opportunities to confront who we are and ask our self how we respond to a world that seems stuck in reaction mode. Maybe you, like me, find yourself in reaction mode more often than you like.

How do we move from reaction to respond mode? I wish it were as easy as shifting gears in an automatic transmission car. If you’ve read other blogs of mine, you know that I am a big re-framer. I am all about identifying the silver lining and living in its reflection. This Time of Cusp calls for a different kind of action. 

Like reframing, that action begins with awareness. Awareness of how the external world is triggering the quagmire in our internal world. Once aware, we can no longer ignore the biases that push their spindly stems out of our being. We know that have a choice — to stay stuck in those biases or weed them out and become who we really are.

Make no mistake about it, during this time, we will act. It is just unclear if it will be a reaction or a response. A response is a result of being anchored into who we truly are is. This necessary anchoring is created by knowing who we are, understanding how we get trapped by our triggers, and freeing ourself from the cycle of getting caught and reacting. 

This is not the work of the faint hearted. It is all too easy to say, “I will do this another day.” It takes courage and strength, unwavering fortitude to stand on that cusp and be who we are. To say, “I am doing this today,” no matter how scary the uncertainty is.

Books have been written on how to navigate uncertain times. I wrote one myself: Imperfect in an Uncertain World. These books are terrific resources for living in an uncertain world. But, how do we begin? If I had to share one tool, it would be practicing being in neutral or being an objective observer. When you are in neutral, you notice how you are impacted by all the stuff. 

How do you get to neutral? Discover where you hold your neutral. Listen to this meditation on YouTube or use the following prompts: Close your eyes…take a couple of breaths…become aware of your body…where do you hold your tension…make a mental note of how your body feels….next, think of something that is very upsetting…find the place in your body where you are holding it…don’t hold on to the feeling…just be with it…no judgment…no defending…allow the energy of the emotion to dissipate…return to your breath…think of something very happy…go to that place in your body where you hold your happy thoughts…just be with it…allow the energy to dissipate…think of a neutral thought…something that you have no feelings about one way or another (Mine is the Detroit football team. I am so neutral on this one that I have no idea the name of the team.)…once you have that neutral thought, become aware of your body…where are you holding your neutral?…How does your body feel? Remember the feeling.

Practice holding neutral when you are feeling a high emotion that you do not want to react out of.

This movement from sleep to awake is huge. How do you know you are there? You may be filled with niggling itches that something isn’t quite right; that it is time to make a change. You may feel uneasy about your life routine. Those are signs that you are being impacted by this Time of Cusp. The time of transition. You are being pushed from your complacency into a scary place of uncertainty. 

Are you there? If so, know that this Time of Cusp calls us to be in the moment. To be warriors of response. That begins with awareness and holding your neutral. 

 

Vanessa F. Hurst, ms, lives on the cusp. listening to the voice of intuition. As a contemplative coach, an intuitive-coach-catalyst, she uses mindfulness practices and intuition tools to create strategies for personal and relationship transformation. She is a professional speaker & author who weaves inner wisdom into all she touches. Her books are available @ www.wildefyrpress.com. Her most recent book, As Natural As Breathing: Being Intuitive, is available on Amazon. Contact Vanessa for life coaching, intuitive consultations, keynotes, and programs.

Website / LinkedIn Profile / Facebook / Twitter: @fyrserpent / ©2021

You Are The Change (Even When You Don't Know It)

Gandhi had it right: be the change you wish to see in the world. But, how do I/you do that? Another Gandhi quote sums up the path of transformation nicely: “my life is my message.” When each of us truly shares our message, lives with soul purpose, then we are the catalyst for powerful change. 

Sometimes I want this change to happen overnight. Maybe you are just as impatient as me. Although radical, quick change is possible, that seldom happens. Change begins with a seed of awareness that is nurtured with each resolute drop of determination. Transformation is built upon the little things — the seeds of hope and acts of determination. 

This time of year mimics the nurturing seeds of change. We are at the beginning of a growing season. Now is the time to plant seeds and then care for the fragility of life. The stance toward the first sprouts of change must be the same. Like those first fragile plants of spring, we don’t look at change poking through the soil of our soul and say, “phew, that was hard work, but I did it.” No, we know that the initial evidence of our movement into change is only the beginning. 

We recognize that in order for change to “take,” it needs a firm foundation. We lay a foundation with our determination and joy. We celebrate those fragile sprouts of change. In this rejoicing, the roots of change grow deep into the soil of our being.

Not everything we sow brings about transformation of our true self. I have found that sometimes I sow seeds of change that don’t quite sync with who I am. That change just doesn’t reflect my soul purpose. Change begins with seeds of awareness. Course corrections happen when we recognize what is growing change and weeds of stagnation are sprouting in our garden.

This awareness is cultivated through reflection, introspection, and integration — what I call RI². This three stop process helps us deepen our understanding of our message and how it is an agent for change in our self and the world. 

We reflect upon what is happening. Introspect what we gleaned from our thoughts, words, and deeds. We come up with a plan to pull weeds from our garden and grow our change. That final step is integration. RI² is about saying to those weeds, “This isn’t me. This isn’t the way that I want to live. I am willing to uproot what isn’t me so that who I am can fully grow.” 

So, how do you do this? Let’s dig into RI²:

• Reflection: this heart based activity empowers you to do a personal assessment. I like to call it fact finding gleaned from your thoughts and emotions. It is noticing without judgment or drawing conclusions. 
• Introspection: this activity connects what you have gathered in your heart with your head. During this time, you objectively assess the information that you gathered. You identify patterns. Name how what is happening that is in line with your soul purpose and identity what doesn’t sync with you. During this time, you ask yourself, what can I do differently? You make a plan to get back on the track of transformation.
• Integration: this activity is the doing phase. You take what you’ve learned and integrate it into your life. It gets you back on track.

Note that RI² is an ongoing practice. (Learn more about it in Engaging Compassion Through Intent and Action.) You may find that you need to tweak what you discovered and integrate what is more in sync with your. Maybe you plant a new seed or remove a stem that you thought would bring change. 

RI² gives you the information, the knowledge, the wisdom to choose what change you want to grow into your soul and share it with the world.

How will your message give birth to the change you wish to see in the world?

  

Vanessa F. Hurst, ms, is a change agent who encourages others to be the message they wish to share with the world. As a contemplative coach, an intuitive-coach-catalyst, she uses mindfulness practices and intuition tools to create strategies for personal and relationship transformation. She is a professional speaker & author who weaves inner wisdom into all she touches. Her books are available @ www.wildefyrpress.com. Her most recent book, As Natural As Breathing: Being Intuitive, is available on Amazon. Contact Vanessa for life coaching, intuitive consultations, keynotes, and programs.

Website / LinkedIn Profile / Facebook / @fyrserpent / ©2021/

There Is Just Try

Lyrics have been written. Songs have been sung. Quotes have been made for this tiny, one syllable, three-letter word. Does the word try get a bad rap? I think it does. Remember the Yoda quote? “Do or do not. There is no try.” Was it a little shortsighted? I think so.

So before you read any farther, I have a confession to make. I am an unapologetic Try-er, a risk taker who has gone out on a limb or two that have cracked. But, I have also leap from limbs into the great unknown and discovered myself on the thermals. 

Mirriam-Webster defines try as an attempt. I don’t know about you, but it seems that I have spent my entire life attempting one thing or another. The goal of each try? To be who I am. I’d like to think that each try got me a little closer to me.

Does not quite reaching that goal make me a failure? Does trying and allegedly not succeeding make you a failure? Of course not! Trying is all about figuring out where you are in this life journey. Trying is a way of negotiating this event we call life. Trying is part of discovering what works for us …and what doesn’t.

Let’s use a down-to-earth example. One of the things that I am aware of during this Time of Covid is the inability to try on clothes. So, yesterday I bought this really cool tie-dyed sweatshirt. I brought it home. Put it on. Guess what? If you guessed it didn’t fit, you would be right. So, now I get to do one of my least favorite things — return it. 

If you think about it, when you try and don’t quite get what you were expecting there are consequences. You, and me, get to decide what to do about them. Does that mean that this try  was a failure? Of course not. It was an attempt at adding a cool sweatshirt to my wardrobe. No loss, no fail. 

Maybe you and I need to look at tries in other arenas in our life the same way. In this wild, uncertain journey you and I can never know for sure how something is going to work out. Until we scooch out on that limb, we don’t know. if the limb will hold us, if we will go crashing to the ground, or it we will leap into the unknown.

 If I’ve discovered on thing on this journey of trying, this life isn’t about the complacent. It is about taking risks — the underpinning of trying. So, try to me isn’t a bad thing. In fact, when we try, we engage three important life skills:  

• Be curious. Have a questioning stance. Be open to what you find. Ask the questions not to expect a definitive answer but to get a bit closer to the answer. Be flexible in reframing what you find into a deeper question.
• Be daring. Try new things just for the experience. You may discover, like that sweatshirt, the fit isn’t great. Or, you may discover a new direction, a new skill, or something that just says, “this is me.” 
• Be courageous. Trying can be scary. Even paralyzing. Look your fear in the eye. Gather the strength to meet your fear, address your concerns, breathe into your courage. Then just do it — TRY. Courage says, “Who knows what will happen, but I am going out on that limb! Join me?”

Try, because really, what do you have to lose? Own your inner Try-er. And, maybe, just maybe you will gain a part of you that was never really lost just hidden under the weight of your fears. 

Vanessa F. Hurst, ms, is an unapologetic Try-er who encourages others to embrace their inner Try-er. As an Intuitive-Coach-Catalyst, she uses mindfulness practices and intuition tools to create strategies for personal and relationship transformation. She is a professional speaker & author who weaves inner wisdom into all she touches. Her books are available @ www.wildefyrpress.com. Her most recent book, As Natural As Breathing: Being Intuitive, is available on Amazon. Contact Vanessa for life coaching, intuitive consultations, keynotes, and programs.

Website / LinkedIn / Facebook / @fyrserpent / ©2021