The little girl sobbed, “it’s not fair!” Stomping for foot for good measure, she demanded, “Why?” And stood, arms folded, daring me to answer.
As I looked into the mirror, I had no easy answer for her. Wiping her tears, I gently said, “Oh, little one, the world is a wild and wonder-filled place. It is not always fair. Is it fair that those who live in the city cannot enjoy the dark night sky with so many stars twinkling?”
“Precious child, the world is uneven, filled with highs and lows, the good and the bad. Maybe the not fair, the unevenness, is there so that we can appreciate the hope seen from the highest mountains and reflected in the densest of jungles. If life were fair, we risk becoming complacent instead of relishing the good while learning from the unevenness. Life isn’t fair, but it is ours. Along the way, we are not judged by fair or unfair, but in how how well we navigate through our challenges and find peace despite the turmoil.”
“No, life is not fair. Sometimes there is no tangible outcome in all the good that you do. Sometimes the best you can hope for is have a good set of struts to absorb the shocks on this bumpy road called life. Sometimes our only reprieve happens in those moments when we sail across a dip in the road too fast and go airborne. Enjoying those moments of flight, we are free of the fair/unfair paradox.”
“Little one, as my father reminded me, ‘no one promised you fair.’ One think I’ve learned from the unevenness of my life is that I cannot base my life upon judgments drawn from what is happening in another’s life. Perhaps what I believe to be unfair advantage is a result of the unevenness in their life.”
“So, my darling quest-for-truth, breathe deeply, dry your eyes, unwind your tangled limbs, let go of what cannot be. Life isn’t lived in the fear moments. It is not lived for the fair moments. Fair and just are respite from challenges and life lessons. They remind us to drink deeply of the well of self compassion — to quench our thirst so that we journey through the arid lands.”
So, no, dear one. Life is not fair. When we let go of our need to know why, we begin truly live. A life well lived is powered by self compassion and lived on that crazy, bumpy, windy road that brings us through unevenness into life well spent.”
Love, Yourself.
Vanessa F. Hurst, ms, is a Neural Synchrony™ facilitator, Professional Speaker, and Author who weaves her inner wisdom into all she touches. Her books are A Constellation of Connections: Contemplative Relationships and Engaging Compassion Through Intent & Action. Vanessa assists clients in navigating their life paths with intuition. Contact Vanessa @ vanessa@intentandaction.com for keynotes, programs, and consultations.
Twitter: @fyrserpent / ©2018
You know, Vanessa, at the age of 59 yrs old, I, sometimes,still get upset about things not being fair. Thank you for this blog!
ReplyDelete