Compassion & The Controlled Rock

Don’t rock the boat. Has someone ever said that to you?  Even though you didn’t want to follow the advice, you might have. Maybe things were okay with no boat rocking. Or, maybe you felt an uneasiness —something wasn’t quite right when you conformed. You got more and more frustrated until you flooded that boat with your rocking.

I bet you could have rocked that boat more effectively if you weren’t so frustrated. Maybe if you had a boat rocking plan in the beginning, the outcome would have been different. Most of us who don’t like confrontation — me included — find so many ways not to bring about change until transformation is our only option. Waiting until the last minute, we often react instead of respond to conflict.

There is an art to boat rocking the doesn’t include causing a tsunami of reactions and the subsequent chaos. Let’s call it the controlled rock. This is accomplished through awareness of self, conscious courage, and curious daring. Using our intuition we formulate a plan of action that will get us maximum results from minimum rocking.

Our intuition speaks to us in every moment of every day. Sometimes we choose to listen and other times we are caught rushing from thought to thought, task to task, or distraction to distraction. Cast adrift, we lose our anchor. Our boat sails blissfully unaware into even choppier waters. Our only recourse seems reaction. But, at any point, we can engage a controlled rock. 

We have a choice to turn our reactions into response. Before engaging a controlled rock, we

• Calm and center our self. This may be focusing on our breath or checking in with our thoughts, emotions, or physical sensations. It may include taking a walk, listening to music, or sitting in silence. Or, it might be something else that brings us objectively into the moment. 
• Ask, “What is going on inside of us? What woundedness is hurting? How are our triggers poking at this woundedness?
• Name the triggers and the woundedness.
• Love and accept our self — imperfects, wounds, and all.
• Ask, “How can we respond in loving gentle ways while bringing about effective change?”
• Listen to the answers with courage and curious daring.

Any boat can be rocked in compassionate ways. But, it takes courage to create a controlled rock response instead of a rocking reaction. It takes curious daring to explore how we can affect positive change and courage to be a change agent. When we rock the boat, those droplets of potential transformation splash upon us and other. They wake us up to the awareness that change, although  necessary, does not need to be frightening. 

Vanessa F. Hurst, ms, is a Life Coach through Intuitive Connection, professional speaker, and author who weaves her inner wisdom into all she touches. Her books are available @ www.wildefyrpress.com. Contact Vanessa @ vanessa@intentandaction.com for life coaching, keynotes, programs, and intuitive consultations.

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