Persisting: Hold ‘Em or Fold ‘Em

 I am a recovering habitual persister. (A habitual persister is a person who continues on the same course convinced if they try something different, that the end result will change.) Instead of staying on the same path, I have begun to consciously see my life as full of possibilities waiting to be experienced. With this perspective it is easier to let go situations that I cannot change no matter how much I persist.

As I write this, lyrics from The Gambler rise to the surface of my mind — “You got to know when to hold ‘em, know when to fold ‘em, know when to walk away, know when to run.” And, I think that maybe I don’t know that I have been living within the same tired parameters that lead me to persist instead of renewing my life. 

Looking back, I name many creative ways that I have persisted in the face of tough odds — how I have managed to be innovative and entrepreneurial without climbing to the apex of transformation. I persisted in much the same way that I fought the good fight. (Read last week’s i&a blog).

Late last week when a friend of mind told me not once but twice to Persist!, I sat with that word because it didn’t seem a good way to make the necessary changes to a stagnant situation. In fact, that word tied in knots. I thought to myself, “that is the slogan of many women today, why does the word bother me?”

Perhaps I am bothered by a blanket “Persist!” Because persistence in is not always the right avenue to bring about change. I need to feel confident in my plan of action to know when to continue steadfastly persisting and when to know when to fold ‘em, to walk away, to run. Only when we leave an untenable situation can we truly persist in transforming our self and others. 

Persistence is possible through discernment or the ability to distinguish between what is true to our life course and what is preventing us from being our best, most authentic self. Through discernment we understand the futility of continuing as we are or are given the energy to transform through persistence.

Only we can decide if the path we are on is one we should walk or if we need to change how our intent is mirrored in our actions. When we refine the connection between our intent and action, our ability to persist strengthens and evolves.  We evolve from being a habitual persister to an actualizing persister who knows exactly when to hold and when to fold.  

Vanessa F. Hurst, ms, is a Mindful Coach, Neural Synchrony™ facilitator, Professional Speaker, and Author who weaves her inner wisdom into all she touches. Vanessa assists clients in navigating their life paths with intuition. Her books are A Constellation of Connections: Contemplative Relationships and Engaging Compassion Through Intent & Action. Contact Vanessa @ vanessa@intentandaction.com for keynotes, programs, and consultations. 

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