Grieving Into Hope: Personal Grief

It feels like life has given us a barrage of one thing after another. Each of us can reflect upon our life, and I invite you to do that to pinpoint when you began in earnest to grieve a loss. The loss can be something personal. The loss of a loved one, a joy, a pet, something that was uniquely yours. 

Recall a grief — it can be one tempered by time or one that is still poignantly fresh. Sit with the grief. Breathe into it. Which of the stages of Elisabeth Kubler-Ross calls to you? Are you in denial? Are you angry? Do you need to bargain? Are you depressed? Are you accepting the loss?

It doesn’t matter where you are. What is important is that you identify the grief and where you are in your relationship with the grief.

Sit with the grief and how you named it. I am going to ask you to use your five senses to create a multi-sensory image of your grief: 

What does your grief look like? 

What does it sound like? 

What does it feel like?

What does it taste like? (yes, grief can have a taste!)

What does it smell like? 

Create a multi-sense image of your grief. Hold it gently in the palm of your heart. Ask it, “Grief, what would you tell me?” Listen to the response. Tuck the message gently into your heart knowing you can return to it over and over again. 

Grief has always has a message. When we converse with Grief, we are given a kernel of hope. Always. 

How do we move through grief? Grief in all of its grittiness has a companion. That companion’s name is Self-Compassion. Self-compassion is the gentle reminder that we cannot have life without loss. It is not here to erase the suffering. No, it calls us to find ways to alleviate suffering. Compassion, like grief, is an inside job. 

ISelf-compassion is caring for you. Self-Compassion says, “I may not change the trajectory of your actions, but I can minimize your suffering.” Open yourself to me and watch what happens.

And, that is important. Because as individuals, we grieve. Self-Compassion asks us to surrender into the messiness of our life instead of ignoring the grief. Compassion asks us to face the grittiness with courage. When we get to the final stage of grief, acceptance, we accept the loss not because we want to, but because any other action would not have us being true to our core. 

This acceptance is not an act of complacency but an act of power. Only when we listen to the voice of loss do we discover the possibility of hope. Within grief, within loss, is hope.

 Van Hurst, ms, is an intuitive-coach-catalyst. As a contemplative coach, she uses mindfulness practices and intuition tools to create strategies for navigating the mundane and extraordinary. The result of time with Van? Being the change you want to see in the world by creating a blueprint for your life through a deeper connection to your intuition and contemplative nature. 

Van is a professional speaker & author who weaves inner wisdom into all she touches. Her books are available @ www.wildefyrpress.com. Her most recent book, As Natural As Breathing: Being Intuitive, is available on Amazon. Contact Vanessa for life coaching, intuitive consultations, keynotes, and programs.

Website / LinkedIn Profile / Facebook / Twitter: @fyrserpent / ©2022