Compassion is popping up everywhere. Or, maybe I should say using compassion as a justification for actions that bring harm is growing like kudzu. As the ranks of the compassion movement swell, so does the number of people who do not understand that just because you say something is compassionate doesn’t mean it is. Instead of embracing the intent to alleviate suffering, compassion has become a defense for suspect behavior.
Being an emissary of compassion is not easy. Joining the compassion movement is the beginning of a life long commitment to being compassion. It is a springboard for creating a way of living from a compassionate heart. When compassion becomes our lived experience, we are increasingly more aware of suffering and are imbued with the desire to alleviate it. Embracing this way, we can no longer lie to our self or others about how our motives and agendas inform our intent.
When our intent to be compassionate and the resulting actions form our lived experience, we live from our heart — the place where compassion thrives. With our heart, we honestly question our motives, beliefs, assumptions, and judgments. With courage, we identify how they power our compassionate action or enable ongoing suffering. We might ask:
- How do we recognize our own suffering and consciously practice self compassion?
- How do our compassionate actions alleviate suffering while acting as an empowering force?
- How do our actions foster a harsh, festering hurt under a sugar coating of so called compassion?
- How is our so called compassion a reflection of the harm embedded in our motives and agendas?
These are but four of the questions that I cannot answer for anyone but myself. I can only know how my heart trembles with the desire to be compassionate [a Buddhist descriptor]. I might be able to debate the true intent of another, but ultimately only they know how the judgments and assumptions of their heart inform grow non-compassionate kudzu on the path of living compassion.
Compassion requires that we think before we act. The T.H.I.N.K Campaign offers five simple questions that guide us through the compassion movement into the way of living compassion. By answering these five simple questions, we no longer arbitrarily name a behavior as compassionate when it is not. Instead, our actions are the result of compassionate intent.
- T = Is it true?
- H = Is it helpful?
- I = Is it inspiring?
- N = Is it necessary?
- K = Is it kind?
Less you think that meeting these five criteria is difficult, it is not. When we use T.H.I.N.K. as a litmus test, we recognize that compassionate action is truthful, helpful, inspiring, necessary, and kind. We are able to name how our actions are not compassion. When our actions mirror T.H.I.N.K. we become our best, authentic, compassionate self who weeds out the kudzu of non-compassion by T.H.I.N.K.-ing. The kudzu cleared, we journey a cleared path of living compassion.
Vanessa F. Hurst, ms, is a Mindful Coach, Compassion Consultant, Professional Speaker, and Author who weaves her inner wisdom into all she touches. Vanessa offers Neural Synchrony™ sessions to assist clients in navigating their life paths with intuition. Her books are A Constellation of Connections: Contemplative Relationships and Engaging Compassion Through Intent & Action. Contact Vanessa for keynotes, programs, and consultations.
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